Forever XXI: A Shamelessly Egocentric Post about Myself

{Images from Forever21.com}

I woke up at 7:30 this morning screaming with my leg straight up in the air. Have we talked about the charley horses that occur in pregnancy when I'm trying to point my toes like a ballerina? Ivy woke up worried about me screaming, and I've been limping around all day. Then I forgot I had a presidency meeting at my house at 9 AM and excused myself to put a bra on. We've got colds and ear infections. I am currently trying to avoid having a baby whilst blowing my nose, since that is NOT how I pictured this birth would go down. I am 1.5 cm dilated and a bit over 50% effaced, at 37 weeks, so it's not like it's happening NOW, but this cold is a booger bear and might last a week or so. Ivy has two ear infections and a cough, but has an amazing codeine-based cough syrup that works wonders. I'm contemplating doing shots of it, but it warns against consuming while breastfeeding, so I'll probably hold off. I've been slowly checking off my to-do list, one day at a time, and what remains is stuff like put the baby's clothes somewhere, vacuum the floor, shred three years of old receipts and bills, do laundry, make the baby's quilt (I know I've been talking about this one for a long time), teach at church this week, attend my shower tomorrow night, etc. Pedicure? Check--even though the color turned out to be what I call "Chinese New Year on my Toes" (red with gold glitter--doesn't suit me at all, but it's what the pedicurist came up with when I said, "I like this color but I want some sparkle.") Scrapbooking night at my house? Check. We made accordion albums that turned out pretty well, especially for a non-scrapbooker like myself. Organize kitchen cupboards? Check. Thank you Container Store for metal sliding drawers. Try on a dozen shirts at Forever 21? Check. Not a one fit--apparently I am MUCH LARGER in real life than my own eyes behold. I thought it was really funny that here was a nine-month pregnant walking behemoth actually picking up tunics and babydolls to try on in a store clearly marketed for the svelte crowd--not to mention me recently hitting the third decade of my life. I had never "been in there" before and was completely taken aback by the glory of pattern, designs, and darlingness of it all. At such low prices, too! Definitely an incentive to make some decent strides post-pregnancy to be able to wear their clothes. So what did I do? First, laughed, because it was hilarious that I couldn't even get some of the yokes over my head, let alone my arms in the sleeves, then I came home and promptly made a chocolate chip cookie dough mix that my Aunt Phyllis sent me for Valentine's Day. And I ate about 8 cookies. Because they tasted really good and because I haven't had cookies in months.